Monday 7 November 2011

Grey Day



Today was a very Grey Day.
The sky was full of layers of grey cloud, the wind cold and biting, ensuring all Londoners were wearing their coats, scarves and hats if they decided to venture outdoors.

Maybe it was because of the Grey Day weather,
Maybe it was because of all the brick around the place. Brick, brick. Everything is brick.
But whatever the reason, today was a 'low' day for me.

As I walked down the street pushing the buggy on my way to get the bare essentials (milk/bread/eggs), bracing myself against the Autumn chill, I realised I have been harbouring a sad heart lately.
Sad because I miss my dad and mum and family in New Zealand.
Sad because I want my boys to be around their grandparents.
Sad because my boys are on the other side of the world to their grandparents.
Sad because I don't know when my boys will next see their grandparents.
Sad because I wanted, more than anything, to be walking down the street towards my mum and dad's house, calling in to see them for a cup of coffee and a catchup. And probably stay for lunch.
Like what most other families with children are able to do.
The way I always thought it would be.


But that's not the way it is to be at the moment.
Although I am {on most days} confident and at peace with our decision to be in London, on the other side of the world to our families, today was not one of those days.

Today I had a bad case of Home-Sickness.


I miss my mum and dad.
I think I always will.
I miss my sisters.
I miss my brother, my sister-in-law and my two beautiful nieces. One of which I haven't even met yet.
I miss my cat. Yes I do.
Even though she's probably going to be put down within the next week or two, if not already and mum and dad haven't told me yet..., because she's so old (born in 1994).

I miss my husband who has been away many evenings for the past month thanks to people such as Britney Spears, Katie Perry, Tinie Tempah (Who? Yeah I know...), Alice Cooper, Evanescence, the Darkness...
But he is sitting right next to me now as I type so I won't linger here much longer.

Maybe tomorrow will be better.
Maybe I will get more than 2 hours unbroken sleep tonight - that would be nice!
Tiredness has the ability to mix up all that is black and all that is white so everything becomes grey.
That's probably why I'm having a Grey Day.

So I'm going to sit on the couch and have cuddles with my husband now.
That always helps bring balance and colour my world again.



:::


21 comments:

  1. Oh Miss Brigitte! May your heart be full of happiness today. God Bless you Mamma heart!
    Love Sharni

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  2. I know that heart.
    I miss home too.
    I miss our dog (who did die not long ago, while we were here).

    It's not fun the homesickness. It comes and goes though hey?
    Good thing is that God knows and cares about us so much - He is the gap filler!
    xxx Stunning pics too BTW!

    P.S. I know Tinie Tempah. Haha.

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  3. Ahh and I had that homesick feeling on the other side of the world yesterday too!! Prayers now for MORE sleep, I don't know how you do it!!

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  4. i have been sad as well today. and same weather here. must be something we old ladies go thru. love you. and i know you love me. (i know ... still doesn't help.!) ;) talk to you on the sunny flip side.

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  5. Yeah that homesickness hits me too, and its also a gray and muggy day here - albeit not cold. I pretty much always harbour a sadness in my heart, missing home. I would love to mooch around to mum and dad's (assuming they hadn't separated in the last few years) and have a cuppa and lunch like I used to. Eeep.

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  6. Oh Bridgette I feel like that too! Not so much in Spring (like it is here) but I frequently miss my family. They're much closer than yours, but it's still a plane ride away rather than a stroll or a drive across town. It's too far to visit often. I'd love to hang out with my sisters and do a bit of crafting together or play on the Wii, just chill out and chat really. I don't look forward to the day when they have kids and I'm the long distance Aunty. Hoping the sun shines again for you soon.

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  7. So I spelt your name wrong too. :o(

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  8. that darn grey weather & tiredness would not be helping. i often think how it nice it would be to live in another part of the world. then i remember how much my kids in particular would miss there nan. i can't imagine how this would feel for you. cuddles sound perfect. i hope tomorrow is a happier day for you tomorrow. i'd be all smiles to have you over for coffee if i lived closer :)) xo.

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  9. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr........DAD

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  10. Oh, I know exactly how you feel! I am homesick alot at the moment since Dad passed away. I hope tomorrow is brighter for you x

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  11. CRYING. It's just plain DUMB that they're on the other side of the world. I've been massively homesick too. As I was making soup (my old carrot, lentil and kumara recipe - naturally) on Sunday I had flashbacks to sleepy Sundays in our kitchen making this soup for the clan, mum pottering around, Monty at my feet, Winnie being annoying trying to have smooches from the top of the oven (mental - AND I DIDN'T KNOW THEY WERE PUTTING HER DOWN... waaaaahhhhh), Dad reading the paper, my ever-growing collection of autumn leaves on the basket on the table - AND I MISS HOME. Boo. We need a trip home. Pronto. Love you xxx
    P.S. Autumn reds and golds seem to be even more vivid against a backdrop of grey xx

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  12. Hope the blue skies and sunny days come back for you today, and that you had a better night of rest. I know the feeling at least in my experience of feeling homesick for my family and NZ, and wanting the girls to be close to their grandparents etc. It especially comes during our long, cold, winters here when everyone over there is out in the sun, at the beach and having BBQs! Praying for a better, brighter day and some good contact with family and friends :) x

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  13. oooohhhh!!! yucky homesickness!! when did they say thats about winnie? i didn't know about that!

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  14. Read it again......BLAST......more blasted tears......DAD

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  15. Hey lovely lady...may the homesickness pass soon and blue skies return. Although the fact that we feel and mourn the distance from loved ones makes us treasure the relationships more in our hearts, and make the snippets of time we do have so precious when we are all together in the same time and space.

    Hugs xx

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  16. Winnie is still alive and well ... just to keep you up-to-date on this! We might have to put her down in the not-too-distant future but she's still her fearsome self and not ready to depart yet xxx!!

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  17. Thinking of you. Grey days suck and I hope you have found a little more sunshine over the passed few days.

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